My List of Movie Pet Peeves

The “One Liner” – Oh goodness, probably the worst cliché of them all. Why this has become a staple of all movies, I will never understand. Here are some famous ones “You're terminated, [bleep]er.” “We’re gunna need a bigger boat.” “Snakes, why’d it have to be snakes?” “Say Hello to my little friend.” “Brothers, what we do in life... echoes in eternity.”

Repeating those last few words – “I’ll never let go, Jack. I’ll never let go.” “That’s it, man. Game over, man. Game over.” “We'll get there, Pop. We'll get there.” What is that?! I think it occurs at least once in every movie. It’s for emphasis, but sometimes it’s a line that doesn’t mean a thing and then it just stands out as the one line that’s repeated. Do every day people duplicate what they’re saying for emphasis? It would be funny if they did!

Somebody Always has a Connection Somewhere – This one’s a favorite of mine in thriller movies. There will be some obscure challenge in the way of finishing the mission and one of the characters, even just a random extra, will pipe up with helpful information they read in a magazine or have a family member with a connection. How convenient! I think there should be more Googling of information in movies, let them pull up a Wikipedia article and that’s how they get the needed information.

“Let me tell you my whole plan” speech – Lets set the scene – the bad guy has a hostage or is about to escape and thinking he’s off the hook he tells the good guy (and the audience) why he’s involved in this elaborate, crazy plan. We the audience know its coming and there’s nothing we can do to stop it, but it just pours out of the bad guys mouth like a…well…script!

No Bathroom Breaks – Unless for comedic purposes, do people use the bathroom in the movies? No one gets up after dinner to pee or has to go number 2 when they first wake up in the morning. It just isn’t glamorous enough I guess, but neither is it realistic.

Unrealistic Dwellings – One reason I love movies that take place in NYC so much is the apartments they have the characters live in. No matter what occupation the character supposedly has they always have an amazing place! One recent example is from “My Best Friend’s Girl.” Kate Hudson and her roommate have this INCREDIBLE two story townhouse/apartment thingy! Neither has a hugely important job that they spend a lot of time at, so how can they afford such a place? Oh yeah, I forgot, it’s a movie.

Don’t People Work? – Isn’t it amazing that movies always seem to be taking place on the weekend or other national holiday where everyone has the day off?! It’s rare to see someone worry about spending days and weeks seeking out their one true love or running off to a tropical location without any contact or notification to their offices and they always seem to have plenty of money to spend too.

Parking in the Front – When good guys are chasing bad guys in cars and need to get into a building quickly, they always find a close spot. When the sweet guy wants to surprise his lady, there is always a parking place up front. Where’s the wasting 10 minutes for someone to pull out of spot, or the three trips around the lot before spotting the smallest space in the back. It’s just not fair!

Make up in bed or at the gym – An episode of “Chuck” helped me think of this one. It looks funny when women in the movies are wearing obvious makeup when they first wake up or while they’re at the gym. And I don’t mean the makeup that helps the actors not look shiny or a little bit of eyeliner, but full on lipstick, fake lashes, eye shadow of an unnatural color, etc. I wish it were that easy, it would save a lot of time in the morning getting ready for work, but makeup smears and it’s bad for your skin if you leave it on. So what do women actually do? They take off their make up!

All people know how to use guns and hit their targets – As seen recently in ‘Eagle Eye’, any person, including children can, in a high crisis situation, acquire a random gun, know how to shoot it and hit their intended target. For once, I want to see someone try that in a movie and get knocked on their rear because of the kick back from the gun.

Sports movies have one of two endings – the underdog wins or the underdog looses and learns a lesson – Watching an underdog succeed is a wonderfully uplifting experience…except when it’s predicable from the start of the opening credits. The two possible endings to sports movies are terrible and someone should come up with a new one because the sports’ industry deserves more than a clichéd ending.

Too much is revealed in the trailer – Have you ever seen a trailer for the latest Will Farrell or John C. Riley film and thought it looked hilarious, which peaked your interest in the movie only to be disappointed by the film because all the funny parts were already in the trailer?! It’s just something to expect now a days, along with the disappointment that follows when the movie is ruined for you.

“Basically, I'm for anything that gets you through the night - be it prayer, tranquilizers or a bottle of Jack Daniels.” – Frank Sinatra
So may the prayers, tranquilizers and JD be with you and see you next time.


patrick said...

Shia LaBeouf has turned himself into a sure bet for a movie to make millions and millions no matter what... even though his name is hard to remember (and spell)

BloggingFun said...

Hi Patrick,
Thanks for commenting. Is that a movie pet peeve of yours?